October 2012
1 post
She Let Go
Without a thought or a word, she let go. She let go of fear. She let go of judgments. She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head. She let go of the committee of indecision within her. She let go of all the ‘right’ reasons. Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go. She didn’t ask anyone for advice. She didn’t read a book on how to let go. ...
September 2012
1 post
I want...
to start blogging again. Get my thoughts down, to make sense of them all. One second at a time.
April 2012
6 posts
I know I’ve got to start. The very thought of refocusing on studying for the GRE scares me, unmotivates me. Makes me crawl right back into my comfort zone where tests like this one never existed. F*** fear. I’m going in.
Resurrection
Woke up this morning with such a grateful heart. To think that Jesus rose for the sake of me and all the others who believe makes me so thankful. To add to that, this is my first Easter as a mother, a soon to be wife. How can I not be grateful? So I got to thinking that I have a chance to be resurrected. To become new as a woman, mother, teacher. So many people are not aware of the significance of...
March 2012
4 posts
it’s only Tuesday and I am already dreading back to work. I’ve contemplated all the reasons why I should not even get up from bed and leave my son all day…ugh
“Learn everything you can, anytime you can, from anyone you can - there will...”
– Sarah Caldwell (via corona-borealis)
I’m officially returning to work on Monday. I’d be lying if I said I was excited to be returning, going back to my old routine. I don’t do well with routine. I am easily bored, distracted and overwhelmed. I’m not looking forward to the dramatics that come with the people and the occupation. All in all I am trying to make a not so good situation seem better than what it...
February 2012
11 posts
I am throwing myself full on starting tomorrow. I need a distraction or maybe two distractions to keep my mind busy and focused on OTHER things. Things that won’t make me cry in the middle of the day or have insomnia at night.
The 25 common words that should form the building blocks of a toddler’s vocabulary:
-all gone
-baby
-ball
-banana
-bath
-bye bye
-book
-car
-cat
-cookie
-daddy
-dog
-eye
-hat
-hello/hi
-hot
-juice
-milk
-mommy
-more
-no
-nose
-shoe
-thank you
-yes
I think that...
No, I KNOW that I need a fresh start in every aspect of my life. There are times I tend to over think things and situations instead of being proactive and just making those moves that I know should be made. So I’m starting from scratch, at the beginning where I know I need the most change.
Physically- I need to feed myself. It’s been 6 weeks since my son has been born and 6 weeks...
The world is a lot bigger than you, I hope one day...
seriously considering...
Moving to a different state and starting over. I’ve had the urge to just get up and go for a while now….ignoring that urge, I may just be selling myself short. Having a family of my own makes me urge for that change even more. Break the cycle, living conditions, barriers. I want to do it all just not in NJ anymore. So I’m looking into it. Getting advice from a couple people I...
January 2012
19 posts
“I can’t explain what I mean. And even if I could, I’m not sure I’d feel like it.”
– J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye (via decrepito)
I hate....
having to wait……
I like..
the idea behind KIPP and the Newark Charter Schools. The fact that they focus on the underserved communities and the students regardless of the previous academic record makes me believe that there is some hope for Urban education.
I am...
exhausted. mentally. physically. emotionally. I can’t remember the last time I slept at night.
Let's see..
- Last month I applied for a teaching job at a school in Newark. Last night, as I checked my email I realized I have a 45 minute phone interview on the 27th. I’m excited and nervous. If it is for me, God will bless me with it. If not…it ain’t my time.
Brayden Jaydeous Baker born January 10, 2012 at 2:05 pm. 7 pounds, 2.8 ounces. He is my pride & Joy :)
“Where they burn books, they will in the end also burn people.”
– Almansor, Heinrich Heine (via gthought)
countdown
8 more days today.
Exactly a week tomorrow.
- I’ve done nothing but sleep these past few days. Sleep won’t come to me at night and I lay in bed and stare and wonder when this pregnancy will finally come to an end. During the day it literally hurts to get out of bed and be productive. 10 days is feeling like an eternity.
“”when u chase things, they will always run from u. try moving through...”
FALSEtto....
In my dream, you were there.
Dressed to impress the next cuz no matter what I did I could never be enough.
In my dream, you were there.
And I was feeling as useless as ever cuz I was one big mistake in your eyes.
Or maybe I wasn’t but a reflection of everything you could never be.
In my dream, you were there. It was 3am and I was being dragged out of bed cuz another fight had ensued and...
Not on my time
But HIS timing is impeccable.
This year
There will be no check off list of things I want/need to “change”, just continuous effort in becoming a better ME. This year I pray that God assist me in becoming a great mother to my soon-to-be son, a compassionate wife to my soon-to-be husband, a wiser educator, and a stronger Christian woman of strong character. My New Year’s resolution is not to have a resolution, but a...
December 2011
28 posts
My son
may be the only child I have.
I’ve got my reasons.
one wish.
All I want to do is go to school. Engross myself in education and writing classes. Lose myself in the beauty of forgetting, relearning, and learning. Reach another level of myself that is probably dormant right now. School is all I want.
My dreams have been so bizzare lately. Faces that I thought I had forgotten are reappearing, hate that I didn’t know I felt towards people is appearing, and desires I’ve always had but have kept secret are lingering.
I’m almost afraid to close my eyes & feel the things that I really feel.
All I wanted
was to see some snow this holiday season. I am yet to see it.
